My issues with myself makes me human and it's beautiful to be human

Sometimes I feel inadequate…like not myself. I'm generally a positive person but sometimes I would have negative thoughts as if my life is going no where. I wished that my passions were always consistent as I keep pushing through life but then I would feel inadequate. It's like this sometimes when I'm about to have anxiety. It's been a problem since beginning of 2016. Last year was an okay year where I was busy but my head was filled with thoughts springing through every corner of my head. I do have the tendency to think too much but I'm going to say that I am mostly good about everything. Right now I'm just blogging and doing my fashion stuff on Instagram and it has kept me somewhat busy. Last year was an even more busier year as I went full time in school and towards the end of the year I finished school and worked for a little while.

My passions lie mostly in people. I do most of everything because of people. Sometimes when I'm home and have no one to talk to, I get bored and just sit in my room , staring at the walls. In a way, I am lonely but in  a way I am not. Maybe I should start looking for companionships online who will be readily available for me, whom I can talk to whenever. My family doesn't really have time to communicate with me so sometimes when I have a chance I would talk for long periods. There is a lack of good communication going on in my family and I am probably the only one here who wants to communicate. My mom and dad talk a lot like me but they are not fluent in English. I have a language barrier when it comes to communicating to my parents.

Anyways I wish I didn't feel inadequate sometimes because it's my insecurities coming out of me. Almost everyone has insecurities but me I gotten away from feeling very insecure from a while back. Right now the why I am now is good compared to how it used to be. This is why I get up close and personal here because I do not feel insecure mostly.if I am confident to whom I am nothing will push me down and I will not once again fall off my feet. I have hit rock bottom many times and each time I get confident with myself when it comes to getting back to where I need to be.

I will find my way and I will once again feel that passion pushing and forcing its way through life. I do want everyone to find happiness and their passions in life because I know… I used to be dispassionate about life. I really want to be there for everyone and I want to see more love and happiness in this world. I deserve happiness as much as everyone because everyone including me is important to this world. Without you I wouldn't have this life. Without me you wouldn't be sitting there reading my blog.

Anyways I do want to get pass my anxieties and move on. My life keeps having pauses and stops and I need to keep going. I must be strong like I've been throughout my life so I can feel the warmth of life of the sunshine that wants to break through the clouds when it gets rough.

Yes… life is supposed to be beautiful. But these issues make me human. It's beautiful to be human.